Day One: Sunday

• Woke up 1pm to text from Joe: "woman on bus trying to explain embarrassing bodies to her mate. "it's this show called like my disgusting body... people go on it and are like 'i've got cancer in my bumhole' ... 'i've got a really fatty armpit' "

• It was sunny
• Got pushed over by one million thrifty ladies, largely elderly and of Indian descent, at ASB Showgrounds cosmetic sale
• Tried to go to new frozen yoghurt shop : no carparks
• Ate KFC Original Fillet Burger Combo w/Mountain Dew + chocolate mousse
• Went to The Wine Cellar
• Did not take dating advice from people already in a relationship ("Just say 'I like you, do you want to go on a date'/'Hello, would you like to go outside and talk'"), decided to stick with "do a face, then wait a month" and "1/3rd weird, 2/3rds playin' it cool" (NB: this has never worked)
• Got the eye from someone I think is a teacher and also knows my address via mailing list
• Played it cool
• Saw The Tokey Tones/"Porch Singers"
• Bought a green can of Sprite, a can of "Godfather" imported beer and a packet of chicken chips
• Man in store laughed at my ID
• Went to Isabelle's house
• Gave her some Like and Dislike self-inking stamps with thumbs up/down
• Proofread some political textbook review essays
• Caught a taxi home, 1am (taxi driver had one eye, called Iqbal)
• Did a weird Facebook birthday post
• Wore this outfit to disguise that I was 5-20 years younger than everyone else: